Wikipedia:Peer review/Tron: Legacy/archive2

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Tron: Legacy[edit]

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… Old peer review cancelled due to construction tag still being on, have to re-submit.

Thanks, RAP (talk) 14:04 26 May 2012 (UTC)

Comments

  • What is CLU?
  • See WP:DASH for en-dashes in the lead rather than spaced hyphens.
  • "Kosinski wasn't interested" avoid contractions.
  • Last para of lead is odd, talks about how the production started in 2009 and then.....
  • And filming is active, so more likely "took place" than "occurred".
  • " abandoned Video arcade" no need for capital V here.
  • " Sam discovers a secret chamber in which Sam unintentionally " in which he...
  • No need to capitalise Light Cycle.
  • Don't think you need to link science, religion, medicine...
  • Nor sunrise.
  • "Owen Best plays the seven-year-old Sam Flynn." not sure why that needs to be indented. Would just add it, referenced, at the end of the main character bio.
  • "became the first feature film created entirely from computer animation" is that actually true? I thought there was live action before it became the computer animation?
  • I'm not sure you need to use ref [32] 8 consecutive times. Probably once per para would be sufficient.
  • "We also get a glimpse ..." not encyclopedic writing.
  • "along with a special presentation of material " why "special"?
  • "40 minutes of the film" most of the time I think we avoid starting sentences with a number.
  • Don't overlink 3D.
  • "That is not interference or a production fault" who said it was? Just explain what it is, not what it isn't.
  • Don't miss the diacritic on the Galapagos...
  • No need to link France.
  • " stradivarius" is a name so should be capitalised.
  • "used it a large scale simultaneously" I don't understand this at all.
  • "being then followed by " no need for "being then".
  • You link CSS but not GIF, why?
  • "Tron themed monorail passing through Epcot at the Walt Disney World Resort." period not required.
  • (enough of main body for now)
  • Don't mix date formats in the refs for the same parameter (i.e. don't have yyyy-mm-dd and dd mm yyyy mixed together for, say, access date).
  • Check titles for SHOUTING and incorrect use of hyphens per WP:DASH.
  • Decide if author names should be First Last or Last, First and be consistent.

The Rambling Man (talk) 09:05, 7 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

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