Wikipedia:WikiProject Biography/Peer review/Fat Freddy's Drop

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Fat Freddy's Drop[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I'd like to get this article as close to featured quality as possible. I've searched through every source I could think of (local NZ papers, journal articles, etc), so I think it's a pretty comprehensive article on the topic, but let me know if you think otherwise. Is the language too informal? Does it trail off and become a boring collection of facts in the "True Story" and "Boondigga" sections? Any comments will be appreciated. —Sebquantic (talk) 03:30, 29 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]


Comments

Lead section:
  • "Originally a jam band formed in the late 1990's of musicians from other bands in Wellington..."; "formed...of" is not grammatically correct. "formed...from" would be better.
  • "Fat Freddys Drop is known for their improvised live performances; songs on their studio albums are versions refined over years of playing them live in New Zealand, and on tour abroad." Mixing the singular and plural forms ("Fat Freddys Drop is..." and "songs on their studio albums) is somewhat confusing.
Live at the Matterhorn and Singles, 2001-2004:
  • "An established group from Kaikoura named Salmonella Dub—who one member described as the "forerunner for Fat Freddys"—provided the band opportunities to play in front of larger crowds in New Zealand and neighboring Australia.[7][6][23]" Generally, references should be in order; place 6 before 7, rather than 7 before 6.
Photos:
  • The "Fat Freddys Drop group photo" and "Miramar peninsula" photos should have Alt text.
Article name:
  • If the band's name is spelled without an apostrophe (as note 1 says), then there is no reason why the article name should be spelled with one. I suggest using the "move" tab to change the name accordingly.

Hope that helps. Stonemason89 (talk) 01:24, 10 April 2010 (UTC) Note: this page is transcluded from Wikipedia:Peer review.[reply]