Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/Battle of Hwanggan

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Promoted EyeSerenetalk 10:00, 10 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Battle of Hwanggan[edit]

Nominator(s): —Ed!(talk)
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I am nominating this article for A-Class review. —Ed!(talk) 13:29, 23 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]

  • CommentsSupport
    • No dab links, all external links work, all images have alt text and the citation checker tool reveals no errors;
    • I've made a few minor changes, please review to ensure you're happy with them;
    • This phrase in the lead seems a little unencyclopaedic to me: "inflicting huge numbers of casualties on it" maybe just tweak it to something like "inflicting heavy casualties on it";
    • Tense seems off here: "However, the action would solidify the 27th Infantry's" (specifically 'would solidify', maybe just reword to 'solidified');
    • missing word here I think: "US 25th Infantry in the Battle of Sangju July 20", maybe "Battle of Sangju on July 20";
    • another missing word here too: "and it closed there in an assembly area the night of July 22–23." Maybe "on the night of...";
    • This needs to be reworded for POV: "six enemy tanks during.." (specifically 'enemy');
    • "There the Koreans were caught", I assume these were North Koreans?;
    • Use of the word enemy here again: "Surviving remnants of the two enemy battalions withdrew...";
    • I'm not quite sure what you mean here: "where they attacked visible advancing North Korean troops approaching on the road" (specifically 'visible advancing');
    • 'Enemy' again here: "By the morning of July 28 the enemy had penetrated..."; and
    • I think these sentences need to be reworded to clarify the relationship between them: "The battle set the standard for the 27th Infantry, which performed unusually well in the fight. Units of both the 25th Infantry and 1st Cavalry Divisions in their first engagements at Yongdong and Sangju performed very poorly, prompting Walker to order the US forces to stop retreating, and "stand or die."" I assume by the proximity of the two that what you mean is that the 27th Infantry had performed well in its first engagement in contrast to units of 25th Infantry and 1st Cavalry Divisions in their first engagements. Its not entirely clear though however. Anotherclown (talk) 06:35, 30 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]
      • Fixed. —Ed!(talk) 06:24, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
        • No worries Ed, all my points have been delt with so I'm happy to support now. Well done. Anotherclown (talk) 09:44, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments. I made all the following edits (if any needed to be made); feel free to revert. - Dank (push to talk)

  • Dashes are not a big deal, of course, but it will save me some trouble if you'll use them in "Poun–Hwanggan road" (or just say "the road between Poun and Hwanggan" if you like). Chicago 6.78 and WP:DASH are agreed that a dash goes here. In the edit screen, it's the first symbol after "insert", just below the "save page" button. - Dank (push to talk) 20:27, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "As other North Korean forces closed on Yongdong, the NK 2nd Division had arrived in Taejon too late for the fight there, and continued its advance down the Poun–Hwanggan road. The division turned toward Poun. Unless checked, it would pass through that town and come out on the main Seoul–Pusan highway at Hwanggan, about 10 miles (16 km) east of Yongdong. This would place it in the rear of the 1st Cavalry Division and on its main supply road.": As other North Korean forces were closing on Yongdong, the NK 2nd Division continued its advance down the road from Hwanggan to Poun, having arrived in Taejon too late for the fight there. Its orders were to pass through that town and come out on the main Seoul–Pusan highway at Hwanggan, about 10 miles (16 km) east of Yongdong, placing it in the rear of the 1st Cavalry Division and on its main supply road. [I made an assumption here that they were actually going to do what you were describing. If this wasn't a real goal but only a feared goal, then change the language accordingly.] - Dank (push to talk)
  • "ordered the US 27th Infantry Regiment of the US 25th Infantry Division to block the advance. After arriving in Korea, that regiment": ... the regiment. - Dank (push to talk) 22:22, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "a West Point graduate and known as an effective commander": a West Point graduate known as an effective commander.
  • "at 04:00, July 24.": at 04:00 on July 24.
  • "for the next morning" because the next morning. "for" in this sense is uncommon these days, except in certain stock phrases.
  • "western-most": westernmost
  • "placing its loss above 3,000 men": placing its losses above 3,000 men
  • A few misspellings fixed.

Support. Greatly improved work, and I really appreciate it. Just two more things for me, in addition to AC's comments above: I don't know what "it closed there in an assembly area" or "they attacked visible advancing North Korean troops" mean. (Did they not attack other troops that they couldn't see?)

Thanks for the review, Dank! —Ed!(talk) 05:44, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

A1 passes with minor revisions—One day, Ed!, you're going to reach volume 2 and then 3 of Millett, Allan R. The Korean War :) Fifelfoo (talk) 02:10, 6 January 2011 (UTC) Fifelfoo (talk) 06:30, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

  • Sources:
    • Location required: Varhola, Michael J. (2000) ; Millett, Allan R. (2000), ; Fehrenbach, T.R. (2001) [1994] ; Ecker, Richard E. (2004), ; Catchpole, Brian (2001) ; Bowers, William T.; Hammong, William M.; MacGarrigle, George L. (2005), ; Alexander, Bevin (2003)
    • Given in bibliography but not used in notes, "Ecker, Richard E. (2004), "
  • Notes:
    • Link appears broken? Millett 2010, p. 380 ;
      • Fixed, I think. I don't know what's wrong with it, it's identical to the other refs and I can't find any errors in the coding. —Ed!(talk) 06:24, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
        • Millett 2010 was cite book; the autolinky thing was only working with the citation template citations. Changed Millett 2010 to citation. I noticed because of the difference between " , " and " . " separators.Fifelfoo (talk) 06:30, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    • New York, New York: either states for all locations or none :)
  • Support Comment: looks quite good to me:
    • images appear appropriately licenced (no action required);
    • the capitalisation of "27th Infantry Adavance" section heading should be tweaked. I think that this should be "27th Infantry advance" per WP:MOSHEAD;
    • the caption of the image in the Outbreak of the war section, "US Forces retreat during the Battle of Taejon": I think this should be "US forces retreat..." as US Forces isn't a proper noun (or is it?). I'm not sure, to be honest. AustralianRupert (talk) 09:29, 6 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page, such as the current discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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