Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates/George Went Hensley/archive2

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Adressed comments by Crisco 1492[edit]

Lede
  • holiness - Seems like an unnecessary easter egg to me
  • Is wikilinking illiterate necessary?
  • "He had many conflicts with his family owing to his drunkenness, frequent travels and inability to earn a steady income, and these factors were cited by his first three wives as reasons for their divorces." -- A little unwieldy. Perhaps "He had many conflicts with his family owing to his drunkenness, frequent travels and inability to earn a steady income; these factors were cited by his first three wives as reasons for their divorces."
  • "Hensley was arrested in Tennessee on moonshine-related charges and sentenced to a term in a workhouse, from which he escaped and fled the state. " -- Noting if this was during Prohibition would be helpful

More to follow Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:13, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Early life
Ministry
  • ("And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name... They shall take up serpents" Mark 16:17–18, KJV) -- Should there be a comma or semi-colon separating the quote and the verse?
Church of God and snake handling
Resignation from the Church of God
  • Couple of these sections are quite short...
Return to ministry
  • Reason for the divorce?
  • "While ministering at a Salvation Army church in Ohio, Hensley met Irene Klunzinger." - Any idea when?
Ministry in Tennessee
  • "Hensley continued to travel around Tennessee, encountering a mixed reception from those who were aware of his past." -- "receiving a mixed reception", perhaps?
Final years
  • Wife's name?
  • I'd merge that last sentence
Personal life
  • "Relatives of Hensley traveled to Chattanooga to care for her." -- "Hensley's relatives..."?
  • Any way to merge that last paragraph so we don't have a little stubby paragraph down there? Or expand it?
Death
  • Glossolalia -- Perhaps speaking in tongues, for greater general understanding? Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:48, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "although his wife Sally stated that she believed it was the will of God." -- No issue, just an interesting line.
  • "Sally resolved to continue spreading her late husband's teachings, claiming after the incident that she had not lost "an ounce of faith".[50]" -- How'd she do with that? Any success? Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:48, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Not as nice a read as your last one, but still quite interesting. Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:48, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
    • Ahh, that was a high bar though :) Alright, I have done all but the glossolalia one, I can't think of a good way to make "speaking in tongues" fit. I'll defer to Astynax on what to do there. Mark Arsten (talk) 18:17, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
      • Looks much better. Just waiting on glossolalia. Crisco 1492 (talk) 23:09, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
        • Ok, seeing as it was somewhat tangential I removed it. Mark Arsten (talk) 23:31, 14 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
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