Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Can't Hold Us Down/archive2

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was archived by Laser brain via FACBot (talk) 23:53, 16 May 2016 [1].

Can't Hold Us Down[edit]

Nominator(s): Simon (talk) 13:50, 24 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about "Can't Hold Us Down", a song by American recording artists Christina Aguilera and Lil' Kim which discusses feminism. It passed its good article review (nominated by WikiRedactor (talk · contribs)) in June 2013 and was nominated for featured article in March 2014 by me and WikiRedactor. Though thouroughly written and researched and backed up reliable sources, it was not passed at the time as there was a delay in the progress. I am renominating this article as I believe it is ready for FA status. Any comments on the development of the article would be very much appreciated, Simon (talk) 13:50, 24 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from JDC808[edit]

I read through the article, made a couple of copy-edits, and honestly, I only have a couple of comments.

  • I noticed that in the infobox, Lil' Kim is credited as a writer, however, nowhere else in the article is she given this credit.
    • Example 1&2: In the lead, The track was written and produced by Scott Storch, with additional songwriting credits by Aguilera and Matt Morris. This same information is provided in "Background and release". No mention of Lil' Kim's contributions to the writing.
    • Example 3: In the "Credits" section under Personnel, Lil' Kim is not listed for Writing.
  • So the question is, did Lil' Kim actually write her parts, or did one of the other three write it for her?
    @JDC808: Yes, Lil' Kim did not write her part per the album's notes. Thanks for notifying it! — Simon (talk) 04:59, 29 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • My only other comments is, is the hatnote necessary? In Macklemore & Ryan Lewis's "Can't Hold Us", they never say "can't hold us down", so I don't see why there would be any confusion between the two. I would also suggest removing the hatnote from the "Can't Hold Us" article.
    Removed. Simon (talk) 04:59, 29 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

P.S. I also have an article up for FAC, the God of War video game series. --JDC808 ♫ 16:40, 28 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

  • Read back through the article and did a couple more copy-edits. This was something I noticed the first time but didn't question it because it was a direct quote, but maybe the quote needs checked. In the Music video section, in this quote—"a range of issues concerning the represent of gender and race"—does the book say represent or representation? --JDC808 ♫ 13:17, 29 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • @JDC808: Gosh, thanks for notifying that typo. Here's the source from which the text is quoted. Much appreciated, — Simon (talk) 13:29, 29 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Alright, all of my issues have been addressed. I am happy to Support this article's promotion. Great job. --JDC808 ♫ 13:35, 29 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Brief comment from Pedro[edit]

Hey, Simon, long time no see! I think you left me a message on my talk page a couple of weeks ago and I apologize for the tardy response. I've read the article twice and I believe you have delivered a strong GA, but... here comes the difficult part: I don't find the prose excellent. However well-researched it is, and it seems to fully cover the song, I can't give my support considering that aspect. Compare it to 4 (Beyoncé album) – both are thoroughly researched and complete, but only 4's prose is truly brilliant, and I don't want to offend you by saying this. I applaud your work but I believe you should ask for a GOCE copyedit. Later I'll give my full review of the article but, unfortunately, I'll have to oppose. Pedro u | t 18:20, 29 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Prism: I don't think comparing this to 4 is appropriate as 4 is an album and released in 2012, while Can't Hold Us Down is a song and released in 2003, therefore numerous sources regarding the song may have been deleted or archived somewhere. Still, thanks for your comment. Looking forward to a full review soon. Simon (talk) 02:41, 30 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]
I understand that. Here are two sources I found. The Portland Mercury one seems especially great.
Wow thanks! The Portland Mercury one is great, while The Daily Beast One may not satisfy WP:RS. Simon (talk) 13:13, 30 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@Prism: Looking again, I see that most parts of the Portland Mercury article are also the other opinions that have already been listed in the article. Wonder if it could actually help expand the article, but I'm still trying. Simon (talk) 07:49, 8 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Chasewc91[edit]

Without having looked too closely at the article (as of yet – may later), I would recommend moving the first paragraph of "Legacy" to "Reception" and the second paragraph to "Music video." "Legacy" sections tend to be undue puffery of the subject. Chase (talk | contributions) 18:09, 11 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Agreed. Simon (talk) 12:44, 13 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Coordinator note: This nomination seems to have stalled and there is no consensus for promotion after several weeks. Therefore, I will be archiving the nomination. --Laser brain (talk) 23:53, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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