Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Typhoon Tip

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by User:Raul654 17:15, 17 January 2009 [1].

Typhoon Tip[edit]

Nominator(s): –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone, User:Hurricanehink

Typhoon Tip was the strongest tropical cyclone in the entire world, hence this is one of WPTC's most important articles. This was a collaborative effort between myself and Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) (he wrote most of the current meteorological history section). Hope you like it. –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 02:22, 8 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Co-nom. --♬♩ Hurricanehink (talk) 02:22, 8 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment - Prose is pretty darn good, but I found a couple breaches.
  • and offshore shipwrecks left 44 killed or unaccounted for. - ending is kind of awkward, could we reword this?
  • and later on the same day the tropical disturbance which would later become Typhoon Tip organized to the south of Pohnpei. - Organized? Also, that verb is over-used in that section.
  • The extratropical remnant of Tip continued northeastward and gradually weakened, crossing the International Date Line on October 22; it was last observed near the Aleutian Islands.[2] - Mention by/in Alaska, for ignorant readers.
  • In the last section, I think the one-sentence paragraph is close enough to be included in the big one.

I hope I can support this article. ₪Ceran →(cheer→chime →carol) 22:38, 8 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Then, I support. ₪Ceran →(cheer→chime →carol) 23:32, 8 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment. Some more stuff for you per your request. I have comma use issues which may just mean I'm insane. Feel free to ignore me as necessary.
  • Initially, a tropical storm to its northwest hindered the development and motion of Tip, though after it tracked further north Tip was able to intensify. needs a comma after north.
    • Actually, I tend to use commas as little as possible, so the prose flows smoothly. Same with the similar points below. I'll add them if you feel it's necessary, though. –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 17:58, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • a worldwide record low sea level pressure of 870 mbar (hPa, 25.69 inHg) on October 12. At its peak strength, it was also the largest tropical cyclone. Noun and then adjective? Can we make it the same for consistency's sake?
  • U.S. Air Force Reconnaissance flew into the typhoon for 60 missions, making Tip one of the most closely observed tropical cyclones of all time. Just replace of all time with ever so it's less awkward.
  • A disturbance to the southwest of Guam developed into Tropical Storm Roger on October 3, and later on the same day the tropical disturbance which would later become Typhoon Tip developed to the south of Pohnpei. Awkward comma usage, but I can't figure out how to fix it.
  • The typhoon continued to intensify further, and early on October 12 Reconnaissance Aircraft recorded a worldwide record-low pressure of 870 mbar (hPa, 25.69 inHg) with winds of 305 km/h (190 mph), located about 840 km (520 mi) west-northwest of Guam. needs a comma after 12. There are several cases similar to this that I did not point out.
  • Marines inside the camp weathered the storm inside huts that were situated at the base of a hill which housed a full farm. can be reworded to say Marines inside the camp weathered the storm inside huts situated at the base of a hill which housed a full farm.
  • 42 people died throughout the country, with another 71 missing and 283 injured. I think With another is awkward. They're all part of one statistic, so they shouldn't be separated like that.
    • "With" implies that the statistics were related, but again, I'll replace it if you feel it would be beneficial. –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 17:58, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • almost double the previous record of 700 miles (1,130 km) in size. Isn't in size implied and therefore unnecessary?
  • I personally dislike the high frequency of ; as it breaks the flow of the section on the damage. If more of those sentences can be linked together by conjunctions instead of punctuation, I believe the passage would flow better.

Cheers and good luck! DARTH PANDAduel 05:40, 9 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the comments! –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 17:58, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Yea, this article is so good all I can do is sit here and nitpick flow details that really shouldn't have any impact on the FAC at all. I will go ahead and support. DARTH PANDAduel • work 19:07, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Image review

  • All images have verifiable licenses and adequate descriptions. Awadewit (talk) 18:21, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Now there is some sort "internal error" with the link. Awadewit (talk) 18:11, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. Awadewit (talk) 17:31, 10 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support I've got nothing to add to this, great job! Cyclonebiskit (talk) 11:00, 11 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. :) –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 15:43, 11 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support-Love the article! --क्षेम्य Tranquility 21:21, 11 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comments -

  • Newspaper titles go in italics (whacks Julian.. you know that!)
  • Current ref 17 .. UNC Press? What's that? Please spell out lesser known abbreviations in the references.
  • Current ref 3, the publisher should be NOAA, etc, not "monthly Weather log" which is actually the "journal" title for this work.
Otherwise, sources look okay, links checked out with the link checker tool. Ealdgyth - Talk 19:34, 13 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Fixed (I thought {{cite news}} automatically inserted italics, hmm...) –Juliancolton Tropical Cyclone 03:49, 16 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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