Talk:Climate change mitigation
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References
[edit]References are lacking throughout. 2600:1700:2E10:A80:684B:ED49:AD8B:5620 (talk) 01:55, 21 January 2024 (UTC)
- What do you mean? EMsmile (talk) 20:14, 21 January 2024 (UTC)
Adapting the same wording as used at climate change?
[edit]Now that we have found suitable wording for the mitigation content at climate change (in the last paragraph of the lead of that article), should we also massage the same kind of wording into the lead and main text of this article? Pinging User:Efbrazil as they steered that discussion so well. EMsmile (talk) 15:15, 1 April 2024 (UTC)
Thanks! How can I turn down such a nice request? Like a moth to a flame, here's a few thoughts on the first paragraph:
- The existing paragraph is overlong and stilted
- 3/4ths of climate change is fossil fuel use, so that's where we should be putting most of our emphasis
- The remaining 1/4 is mostly land use. Land use is a complicated issue, as it is part of the fast carbon cycle, not the slow carbon cycle, so it's good to bring into the discussion but we shouldn't over emphasize it (more forests is not a solution, they'll eventually rot or burn)
- CO2 removal is a fringe technology, arguably on par with climate engineering (SRM). While it's a necessary part of aggressive pathways, it's also highly speculative and not the key thing to focus on here.
- We need to make it clear that actions to date are insufficient to avoid dangerous levels of climate change, which is not done in the current last sentence
Given that, here's an initial stab at a rewrite. I'm avoiding sources and wikilinks here to keep the focus on the text.
Current version in live article | Proposed version |
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Climate change mitigation (or decarbonisation) is action to limit climate change. This action either reduces emissions of greenhouse gases or removes those gases from the atmosphere. The recent rise in global temperature is mostly due to emissions from burning fossil fuels such as coal, oil, and natural gas. There are various ways how mitigation can reduce emissions. One important way is to switch to sustainable energy sources (a process called energy transition). Other ways are to conserve energy and to increase efficiency. It is possible to remove carbon dioxide (CO2) from the atmosphere. This can be done by enlarging forests, restoring wetlands and using other natural and technical processes. The name for these processes is carbon sequestration. Governments and companies have pledged to reduce emissions to prevent dangerous climate change. These pledges are in line with international negotiations to limit warming. | Climate change mitigation (or decarbonisation) is action to limit climate change. Climate change is caused by increasing amounts of greenhouse gases in the atmosphere, which is primarily the result of burning fossil fuels such as coal, oil, and natural gas. Eliminating fossil fuel use involves conserving energy and replacing fossil fuels with clean energy sources such as wind, hydro, solar, and nuclear power. Secondary mitigation strategies include changes to land use and removing carbon dioxide (CO2) from the atmosphere. Governments and companies have pledged to reduce greehouse gas emissions, but actions to date are insufficient to avoid dangerous levels of climate change. |
— Preceding unsigned comment added by Efbrazil (talk • contribs)
- Thanks a lot. This looks good. As this article is not so heavily guarded, I think we can make incremental changes in the live article without long talk page discussions preceding it. As for your proposed new first paragraph, I like it but I find the second sentence is not linked very well with neither the preceding nor the following sentence. I think we should link them better by using constructions such as "for this reason" or "because of xx, yyy is necessary" (but without generating long sentences). I don't like that the first sentence ends with "climate change", and the second sentence starts with "climate change". But the overall approach and re-focus is good. EMsmile (talk) 09:25, 3 April 2024 (UTC)
- OK, I was bold and edited the page directly with your input here. I see what you mean about the second sentence needing better bridging, so I made changes there. If anyone objects and backs the text out we can take it up here again, but hopefully we can just edit things on the live page to get to where we want. Note I also updated sources for the lead paragraph, including cutting a few sources that seemed unnecessary. Efbrazil (talk) 17:05, 3 April 2024 (UTC)
- That's great, thank you. I've also made some further edits. I've put details in the edit summaries. Feel free to build on this, modify or revert. I have re-checked with the readability tool and most sentences are good, just a couple that are still in red (we can probably live with that).
- But the lead is still a bit on the short side (only 368 words; I think we could aim for 450 to 500 words for an article of this length). Am wondering if we should add a bit on how individual action can help with mitigation? The main text has a section on it, so I think we could summarise that in the lead, e.g. more plant-based diets.
- Maybe we could also be inspired and copy some sentences from the mitigation section of the main climate change article, i.e. from here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Climate_change#Reducing_and_recapturing_emissions
- Interesting how that section is no longer called "mitigation" but "Reducing and recapturing emissions". Wondering if we also want to weave that language into our lead. Not too sure though if "recapturing emissions" is fully correct or abundantly clear though.EMsmile (talk) 21:48, 3 April 2024 (UTC)
- I took an edit pass on the second and third paragraphs, just trying to help it read better and put things in context. A key part was introducing the idea of the fast and slow carbon cycles. A major issue to debunk is the idea of "just plant trees" as a way to mitigate climate change. Efbrazil (talk) 00:15, 5 April 2024 (UTC)
- I think I'm done for today, feel free to go further or suggest what I should tackle next... Efbrazil (talk) 17:26, 5 April 2024 (UTC)
- OK, I was bold and edited the page directly with your input here. I see what you mean about the second sentence needing better bridging, so I made changes there. If anyone objects and backs the text out we can take it up here again, but hopefully we can just edit things on the live page to get to where we want. Note I also updated sources for the lead paragraph, including cutting a few sources that seemed unnecessary. Efbrazil (talk) 17:05, 3 April 2024 (UTC)
I've just carried out the merger from Co-benefits of climate change mitigation. This has made the section on co-benefits a bit too long probably. I've already looked for ways of condensing. Please help with condensing this further (if you think it ought to be condensed). We are actually so lucky that CC mitigation has so many co-benefits. Imagine if it didn't, how much harder it would then be to push it through... EMsmile (talk) 08:33, 12 April 2024 (UTC)
How do we feel about overall length? More culling?
[edit]The overall length of the article is still on the long side: 60 kB (9271 words) "readable prose size". What do folks suggest regarding options for condensing and culling. Does anything jump at you that can be condensed or even taken out? - Or do we argue that 60 kB is not too long for this kind of article. For comparison, the climate change article is 54 kB. EMsmile (talk) 11:42, 16 May 2023 (UTC)
- Personally as this is such a high level subject I would prefer more excerpts but only if the excerpted articles were rated good. So in practice that probably is not going to happen any time soon. Chidgk1 (talk) 17:13, 16 May 2023 (UTC)
- General comment: I'm very wary of excerpting, since they often bring unintended and nonobvious consequences in unspecified locations. —RCraig09 (talk) 19:49, 16 May 2023 (UTC)
- There's always room for updating and conciseness. I think that as public consciousness—along with related political controversy—continues to grow, mitigation will rise in importance, bringing an even greater need for updating and conciseness. As Effects of climate change has been promoted to Good Article status, the present article might be high on the community's to-do list. —RCraig09 (talk) 19:46, 16 May 2023 (UTC)
- Agreed. I think condensing is needed but am unsure which sections in particular need to be condensed, given WP:DUE considerations. And it would be great if the wider Wikipedia editing community took an interest. We have come a long way with this article. The version from one year ago was quite shocking! 101 kB long and rambling and all over the place, impossible to read and understand. I think we should roughly aim for no longer than 50 kB (which means culling by about 15% compared to the current length).
- Looking at the section sizes (see link at the top of the talk page), I have the following suggestions:
- The section "Preserving and enhancing carbon sinks" has perhaps become a bit too long (perhaps we should rely more on the sub-article carbon sequestration to provide people with details).
- Also "mitigation by sector" is probably too long (given that this is covered anyway at greenhouse gas emissions
- Is the section "policies" too long and detailed, given the myriad of sub-articles on this topic?
- Maybe we should drop the entire "example by country" section? Then again, US, China and EU are probably the three most important players (?). The section on the US is anyway only an excerpt, so it doesn't add to the overall word count. Still, perhaps remove all three examples? EMsmile (talk) 07:57, 17 May 2023 (UTC)
- I came back to this one year later and the article has become even longer in the meantime, currently at 63 kB! I think it would be good to get it down to say 58 kB. I had a look at the "section sizes" table at the top of the talk page to see which sections stood out as being overly long. I then condensed the content in:
- Health and wellbeing
- Integrating variable renewable energy
- National policies
- Soils
- What do you all think? I think it would make this article more useful for our readers if we looked carefully for paragraphs with excessive detail and moved those to sub-articles. Also we need to ensure that the overall balance and WP:DUE is just right. EMsmile (talk) 14:30, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
- I came back to this one year later and the article has become even longer in the meantime, currently at 63 kB! I think it would be good to get it down to say 58 kB. I had a look at the "section sizes" table at the top of the talk page to see which sections stood out as being overly long. I then condensed the content in:
- Hi User:Xuhang1204, I've removed this recently added content of yours, because I regard this as excessive detail for a high level article that is already overly long. Look for another article to inculde it in, e.g. greenhouse gas emissions or the one on AI maybe?:
- "AI-driven optimization and predictive maintenance in industrial processes are emerging as key strategies to enhance energy efficiency and reduce emissions, particularly in energy-intensive sectors like steel and cement.[1]" EMsmile (talk) 12:30, 10 August 2024 (UTC)
References
- ^ Akomea-Frimpong, Isaac; Dzagli, Jacinta Rejoice Ama Delali; Eluerkeh, Kenneth; Bonsu, Franklina Boakyewaa; Opoku-Brafi, Sabastina; Gyimah, Samuel; Asuming, Nana Ama Sika; Atibila, David Wireko; Kukah, Augustine Senanu (2023-12-25). "A systematic review of artificial intelligence in managing climate risks of PPP infrastructure projects". Engineering, Construction and Architectural Management. doi:10.1108/ECAM-01-2023-0016. ISSN 0969-9988.
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