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Talk:Live in Tokyo (Charles Tolliver album)/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 11:06, 18 February 2021 (UTC)[reply]


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

I will take this on later today. --K. Peake 11:06, 18 February 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

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  • Infobox looks good!
  • Wikilink jazz
  • "during their first tour" → "during Tolliver and Music Inc.'s first tour"
  • "Truth" being among the original compositions is not directly sourced anywhere in the body
  • The release year of "Round Midnight" is not notable for the lead
  • "about a year later on" → "about a year after the show on" since the year has not been specified since the first para
  • Target independent label to Independent record label
  • Target CD to Compact disc
  • "from that same period." → "from that same period, titled Mosaic Select."
  • "particularly their innovative" → "They particularly highlighted their innovative" because the sentence is a run-on at the moment
  • "although some questioned" → "although some critics questioned"

Background

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  • You are not supposed to add commas before things like this in the body unlike the lead, plus in this context "the" reads better and the second comma renders useless. --K. Peake 06:33, 19 February 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "embarked on their first tour of Japan" part is not sourced and the liner notes probably do not mention it as being their first tour in the country; correct me if I'm wrong

Recording and performance

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  • Reword the img text to being something of relevance, rather just mentioning it being a pic of Cowell
  • "led the quartet featuring" → "led the quartet, featuring"
  • "A 30-second sample with" → "A 30-second sample of "Effi", with" on the audio sample text
  • Might be me getting confused by re-wording, but does the AllMusic ref really mention everything cited for the first sentence of the second para?
  • "and intensely-toned solo" → "and heavily-toned solo" or something similar, to be more encyclopaedic
  • "that led the quartet into" → "that led Music Inc. into"
  • Wikilink should be on block chords instead
  • [9] should not be at the end of the penultimate sentence, as it backs up both of the last two in this para
  • Wikiink time signature
  • The fills part does not appear to be sourced
  • "Music Inc. performed" → "Music Inc. performed a cover version of" but it is not directly mentioned as an encore anywhere

Release and reception

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  • Can you find a mention of any release date for the LP in Japan even if vague?
  • Attribute the Billboard review to Anon
    • "Anon." is a shorthand for "anonymous". It is not the reviewer's in-source title. isento (talk)
  • "The magazine praised the trumpeter's" → "Anon praised the trumpeter's"
  • Target Down Beat to DownBeat
  • "finding it "good" yet" → "finding it "good", yet"
  • "(and Cowell too) ..." → "(and Cowell too) [...]" since that is how you correctly use ellipsis to indicate a period taken out of the quote
  • Target The Penguin Guide to Jazz on CD to The Penguin Guide to Jazz
  • Target CD to Compact disc
  • "as a player" as his performance" → "as a player", as his performance"
  • "was singled out for" → "was singled out by them for"
  • Img looks good!
  • "reviewed the Mosaic box set" → "reviewed the box set"
  • Target Cafe Bohemia to Café Bohemia
  • Target Five Spot to Five Spot Café
  • "from the Village Vanguard."" → "from the Village Vanguard"." per MOS:QUOTE
  • "of the quartet's performances" → "of Music Inc.'s performances"
  • ""'Round Midnight". But he ultimately found" → ""'Round Midnight", but ultimately found" because the former sentence is too short and it is also awkward to start a sentence with the word "but"
    • Writing guides such as this one approve of starting sentences with the word "but". And in this case, this separates the critic's positive idea in one sentence and a negative in the other, while avoiding a run-on. isento (talk) 02:03, 19 February 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Track listing

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Personnel

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  • Good

Notes

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  • Good

References

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Bibliography

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Further reading

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  • Good
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  • Good

Final comments and verdict

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