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User:Captain Crawdad

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CRAWDAD: This is Captain Crawdad.

YOU: Hello, Crawdad.

CRAWDAD: That's Captain Crawdad, you miserable scum. I earned these stars while you were still swimming in your pappy's spawn.

YOU: Okay.

CRAWDAD: Shall we start again?

YOU: No, I was just humoring you. I don't really want to talk to you.

CRAWDAD: Oh.

YOU: Can you direct me to the exit?

CRAWDAD: The exit?

YOU: Yes, the way out of this page. Your user page. I want to leave it.

CRAWDAD: Go out the way you came in, jerk. I don't need you.

YOU: Thank you. If you'll excuse me.

CRAWDAD: I have too many friends anyway. I'm popular.