User talk:Jmmelwani
| This user is a student editor in Wikipedia:Wiki_Ed/Northeastern_University/ENGW_3315_Advanced_Writing_in_the_Disciplines,_Online_(Fall_2017). Student assignments should always be carried out using a course page set up by the instructor. It is usually best to develop assignments in your sandbox. After evaluation, the additions may go on to become a Wikipedia article or be published in an existing article. |
Welcome![edit]
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Please remember to sign your messages on talk pages by typing four tildes (~~~~); this will automatically insert your username and the date. If you need help, check out Wikipedia:Questions, ask me on my talk page, or , and a volunteer should respond shortly. Again, welcome! -★- PlyrStar93. →Message me. ← 05:04, 5 October 2017 (UTC)
Qianqian Zhang's peer review[edit]
I think you did a great job in illustrating your topic from a neutral point of view. However, I think you should change a way to say the first sentence of the third paragraph which you used "it is sad ...". Maybe I am just being sensitive. I think your article is well-organized and the leading paragraph is enough to let us get a general idea of Sociopathy. But I did not find any citations in your article. As Sociopathy is a disorder, you may try to find some researches about it. I believe there will be a lot of sources mentioning it. Moreover, you may want to add something like how the people with sociopathy interact within the society and the process of how scientist try to make an approach to Sociopathy. I think your article is quite academic and authentic, using some professional words. I may try to improve my article with more professional words and explanation strategies.
Lillian Cai's peer review[edit]
Hi Jaya, Your topic is quite interesting. A quick search of "sociopathy" in the Wikipedia search box turns up the Psychopathy page. Have you read that article, in which Sociopathy is a sub-section? You may want to consider adding to that section - I wasn't sure if you were writing a new article or expanding upon that existing section. I second Qianqian's review that there were no citations, so there is no way for me to figure out where your information came from. Will you add these in your final draft?
I think that your use of the words "pretty much" in your first paragraph as well as the phrases "it is sad" in your second paragraph seem a bit casual. Also, your conclusion that "sociopaths should be treated with love and care" sounds like an opinion and not a neutral statement of facts. Perhaps you could consider expanding upon how sociopaths can become functional members of society through treatment and rehabilitation. Again I would consider going back to the Psychopathy article to see if that has been covered. If you believe that Sociopathy and Psychopathy are two different subjects, then it would be important to distinguish the two in your article.