Jump to content

Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Regine Velasquez/archive3

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Gog the Mild via FACBot (talk) 21 February 2022 [1].


Nominator(s): Pseud 14 (talk) 20:25, 6 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about Filipino singer Regine Velasquez who has achieved commercial success in some Asian territories. This is the third nomination at FAC, following a failed attempt in 2020. It underwent a GA review in July 2021, and I have been nursing it up to address the points raised during the second nomination, including a copy editing recommendation. Two rounds of copy edits have since been done among other improvements done, and I have consulted with the reviewer before renom. I feel ready to bring this back for another go. Constructive criticism, in any form and from anyone, will be appreciated. Happy to address your comments and thanks to all who take the time to review. Pseud 14 (talk) 20:25, 6 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Damien Linnane

[edit]
  • "She is known for ... the unorthodox voice training she received during her childhood, where she was immersed neck-deep at sea." I understand she went through this unorthodox training, however, it is accurate to say this training is one of the three main things she is known for? Is her training common knowledge and a common discussion point when she is talked about?
That's correct. It's a widely known fact/detail and a common discussion point that has been written and mentioned in almost every coverage of Velasquez in Filipino pop culture. Here are a few examples [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8]
  • "She explored Manila sound and kundiman ..." I'd consider clarifying to the reader that these are genres. I.e "She explored the genres of ...". I'd similarly consider clarifying that Ang Bagong Kampeon is a contest.
Done
  • "was subsequently certified twelve-times platinum" - Should you clarify this was achieved in the Philippines? Honest question as I'm not sure if it should be assumed you're talking about the Philippines by default when mentioning a Filipino national.
Done, I've clarified this as being certified in the Philippines only.
  • "Velasquez is the best-selling music artist of all time in the Philippines." - Do you mean she is the best-selling Filipino music artist of all time? If so please clarify; correct me if I'm wrong but I assume many Western singers have sold a lot more than 7 million albums in the Philippines.
You're right, I've reworded to clarify.
  • "the nth variation of Roman Holiday" - Why not wikilink Roman Holiday?
Linked
  • "She left the show for health reasons" - This is a bit vague, but I'm assuming you couldn't find anything more specific on the health issues?
At the time of publication, her pregnancy wasn't confirmed yet, but the article only mentions due to "severe migraine attacks". This was brought up in the prior FAC as well and that 'health reasons' would seem appropriate in this context. Let me know otherwise what you think?
  • The personal life section is a bit thin, though I remember you explaining you had trouble finding sources for that at the last FAC.
That's right. Per the last FAC, it was very short-lived, some time in 1994. Finding WP:RS was a challenge since no article or publication has really detailed it and nothing archived as well.

That's all I found in terms of prose and comprehensiveness. Damien Linnane (talk) 13:47, 7 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Damien Linnane: Thanks for your review. I have the addressed the above. Let me know if there's anything I may have missed. Pseud 14 (talk) 15:28, 7 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Happy with changes, and to support on prose. Well done on the improvements with the article since the last FAC. Damien Linnane (talk) 02:27, 8 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Damien Linnane: many thanks for your support! Pseud 14 (talk) 04:17, 8 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Support from Aoba47

[edit]

For context, I have participated in the first FAC and the second FAC. I am happy to see the article back in the FAC space. My comments are below:

  • For this part, which became the new label's maiden release, I think the "maiden release" word choice is rather awkward. I think saying "the new label's first release" would be clearer and simpler.
Reworded
  • I have a comment about the "2017–present" sub-section. The sentence structure is somewhat repetitive, and the last three sentence start with dates, as shown here—On April 25, 2020, she, Later in June, Velasquez, and On February 28, 2021, she was— and I would avoid that so the prose does not come across as listing dates and events.
Reworded sentence structure
  • I am not sure about the "the film's critical failure" wording in this part, Despite the film's critical failure. Maybe something like "Despite the film's negative reviews" instead?
Done
  • For this part, she briefly appeared in the iWant comedy series, I do not think iWant should be in italics.
Changed
  • I would link R&B in this part, style and R&B influence, since it is linked in the lead.
Linked
  • Why isn't Love Was Born On Christmas Day mentioned in the prose? From what I can see, it is only mentioned in the list in the "Discography" section.
Apart from the lack of publication/articles about it, the holiday album did not receive much attention, I've removed it from the discography section as well since it's already in the discography article.
  • There are several "harv warning" issues in the citations. Look at Citation 254 for examples of these.
Not quite sure what "harv warning" issues you are referring, I may be unaware I used the incorrect citation format. What I did use for references like citation 254 is WP:CITEBUNDLE in order to avoid visual clutter of multiple clickable footnotes, esp for awards count. A format I referred to from an FA [9] Let me know if I misunderstood the point you raised.
  • Apologies for that. I used the Harvard citation style in my articles so I have install something that flags citations as having errors if it does not fit that. However, since you are not using that, it is not an issue. Just ignore the above suggestion. Apologies again for my mistake. Aoba47 (talk) 02:41, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
That makes sense now, I do recall your citation formats now that you mentioned it. Thanks for clarifying,
  • For the citation in another language (like Citation 133), I believe an English translation of the title is necessary.
Trans-title added

I hope these comments are helpful. Once my comments are addressed, I will look through the article again to make sure I did not miss anything. I hope you are having a wonderful weekend so far! Aoba47 (talk) 00:47, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Aoba47: thank you for your review! I have addressed the above comments and also have some clarification on one item re citation use. Happy to address it once you clarify. Pseud 14 (talk) 02:24, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • I support the article based on the prose. Unfortunately, I do not feel too comfortable going further into the citations as I am an American and I am not familiar enough with these publications to say anything meaningful about them. Best of luck with the FAC! It would be great to see more Filipino articles in the FA space. I do have one quick question. What was your reasoning for the image used in the infobox? I do not have any issues with it and it does not affect my support in any way, but I was just curious about it. Aoba47 (talk) 02:47, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Aoba47: much appreciate your time in reviewing! On the infobox image, I thought it'd be much better to use something much more recent that I could find (2010) and replace the old image taken in 2005, and thought it looked better (in my opinion). Pseud 14 (talk) 03:04, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
That makes sense to me. I do not have a strong opinion about it either way to be honest, and I trust your judgement as you know more about this person than I do. Again, best of luck with your FAC! Aoba47 (talk) 03:06, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by FrB.TG

[edit]
  • "which sold more than seven hundred thousand copies" - write this in digits.
Done
  • "a further million and a half" - 1.5 million would be much simpler.
Done
  • "partly because of her lack of experience in musical theater, and because she wished to remain with her family" - repetitive prose. because.. because
Reworded
  • "She worked with songwriters including Glenn Medeiros, Trina Belamide, and John Laudon." Be consistent with the placement of a comma before "including". Either do it everywhere or don't do it at all.
Fixed
  • "The album had sold more than 700,000 copies regionally, including 100,000 in the Philippines" - I am confused here. Wouldn't 700k sold copies regionally mean that all 700k were sold in the Philippines, considering she is from the country? Did you probably mean 700k copies were sold worldwide or continentally?
I've removed the the mention of 100k to avoid confusion. The article says 700k sales overall and 100k of those were sales in the Philippines. Nevertheless, just mentioning the total would be consistent with what's in the lead as well.
My issue was with the word "regionally". If the source says it sold 700k copies overall then I take it to mean worldwide and not regionally. So my suggestion would be "The album had sold more than 700,000 copies worldwide, including 100,000 in the Philippines." FrB.TG (talk) 19:16, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Agreed. Changed to your suggestion Pseud 14 (talk) 19:52, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • "For her seventh studio album Retro (1996), Velasquez recorded cover versions of popular music of the 1970s and 1980s from artists including Donna Summer, Foreigner, and the Carpenters." Same as point number four. Do check for other instances.
Fixed this too and reviewed the rest of the article for consistency.
  • "Commercially, R2K sold more than 40,000 copies in its second week of release, earning a platinum certification,[47][a] and was certified four times platinum a year after its release." Repetition of "release" in close proximity.
Reworded
  • "The following year, Velasquez worked with Filipino songwriters for material on her eleventh studio album Reigne.[61] The album and its lead single "To Reach You" were released in December 2001." The mention of the December 2001 release makes "the following year" redundant.
Reworded
  • "Gonzales called the album "an adventurous set" and praised the quality of the songwriting.[61] Two other singles, Tats Faustino's "Dadalhin" and Janno Gibbs' "Sa Aking Pag-iisa", were released from the album.[64]" You should probably place the review at the end of the paragraph. As it is, it reads a bit awkward, talking about the album and its lead single, then the review and then you jump back to the mention of the other singles from the album.
Good point, I've revised the sentence structure.
  • "That year in November, she had a concert residency named Songbird Sings Streisand, a tribute to American singer and actor Barbra Streisand, at Makati's Onstage Theatre"
Done
  • "Its songs were originally recorded by Filipino male artists and was her most expensive cover album to produce due in part to the cost of securing licensing rights for songs by local songwriters,[80][81] including, Ariel Rivera's "Minsan Lang Kita Iibigan".." Unneeded comma after "including".
Fixed
  • "In 2007, she became co-host of the reality television show Celebrity Duets, an interactive music competition based on the original US show." Perhaps add an "eponymous" before "original" to clarify that the original show has the same title.
  • "The Philippine Daily Inquirer praised the album's maturity and wrote; "[Velasquez] no longer.." Why the semi-colon? A comma works just fine.
Fixed
  • "After receiving the Magna Award at the Myx Music Awards 2011,[102] Velasquez took a hiatus from public engagements following the confirmation of her pregnancy." The first part of sentence says the break was followed by the awards, then you say it was followed by her pregnancy. Maybe "After receiving the Magna Award... and the confirmation of her pregnancy, Velasquez took a hiatus from public engagements" would be better.
Agreed, made the change.
  • "For the third consecutive year" - "for a"
Done
  • "The two-night show, Royals, reunited her with Nievera, Angeline Quinto, and Erik Santos." Maybe mention what was it that they did before that they were reunited here. Her prior collaboration with Nievera is clear but Angeline Quinto and Erik Santos are mentioned for the first time in the article.
Revised the sentence structure to clarify. Thanks for pointing out.
Now it reads "The two-night show, Royals, reunited her with Nievera, with whom she had collaborated with on previous concerts, and also features Angeline Quinto, and Erik Santos." My issue was not with how she got reunited with Nievera, as he is mentioned several times throughout the article. It's not him whose previous collaborations need to be mentioned here but rather Quinto and Santos. However, now I see you have completely omitted the reunion part with these two. Another issue: "with whom she had collaborated with on previous concerts" (double use of with, I suggest removing one, preferably the second one) although I suggest removing this altogether because, like I said, her previous work with Nievera does not need to be clarified. FrB.TG (talk) 19:16, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for clarifying this, I must've misunderstood. I've reworded and made it simple to "The two-night show, Royals, reunited her with Nievera and also features Angeline Quinto and Erik Santos", let me know if this works Pseud 14 (talk) 19:49, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Down to the end of the music career section. More later. FrB.TG (talk) 12:46, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@FrB.TG: thanks for your initial review. I have addressed the above comments. Let me know if I missed anything Pseud 14 (talk) 16:40, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
I am satisfied with the replies except where I have stated otherwise.

My final batch:

  • "On several occasions, Velasquez has cited Barbra Streisand as her main influence and musical inspiration, saying; "I look up to [Streisand] not just because of her enormous talent, but because of her fearlessness and dedication to excellence, her willingness to take risks and to be different". Per MOS:LQ, the full stop should be placed inside the quotation mark if the end of the quote coincides with the end of the sentence containing it. So it would be in this case "I look up to [Streisand] ... and to be different." Also why the semi-colon? A comma works just fine.
Done.
  • "She described how she developed her musical style, saying; "I was.." Same as above; use a comma instead.
Done
  • "Elvin Luciano from CNN Philippines wrote: 'During her [initial] phase, she proved that Filipino love songs don't have to come pre-packaged in the kundiman-rooted love ballad'.[197]" MOS:LQ
Done
  • "During the mid-1990s to early 2000s" - "From the mid-1990s to the early 2000s" or "During the mid-1990s and the early 2000s"
  • "Velasquez said; 'I don't mean to..." Comma please.
Done
  • "Many critics complimented her work, often singling out Velasquez's influence; Luciano, writing for CNN Philippines, described her "legitimacy" as "enough to secure a space in pop culture" and said her musical career "continues to influence generations of OPM patrons and songbird wannabes up to this day",[197] while according to The Philippine Star, "If one were to go by records and distinctions made, Regine Velasquez would win, hands down".[27]" This is an incredibly long sentence. I suggest putting a full stop where you used a semi-colon instead.
Done
  • "Manila Bulletin said; 'Most of our.." I think you know what I am asking of you here. I am not sure if the use of a semi-colon is wrong in such cases but it's rather unusual and the use of a comma suffices in all of these instances. Besides, you yourself mostly use a comma in these cases anyway.
Done. I'm trying to recall if the change was made by me or a result of the copy edits. Appreciate you pointing out these!
  • "According to Boy Abunda, 'Most of the young female singers currently making waves in the industry are cut from the same biritera [belter] cloth as Regine Velasquez'.[211]" MOS:LQ - place the full-stop within the quotes.
Done
  • "American singer Brian McKnight who co-headlined a concert with Velasquez, has complimented her singing, stating; 'I got to sing..." Same as above.
Done
  • "She has signed advertising deals with several other brands, including," - wrong use of a comma after "including".
Done
  • "Velasquez has sold more than seven million records in the Philippines and a further million and a half in Asia" - 1.5 million
Done

This should conclude my review. To make sure you don't miss them, I have left replies under some of yours and need further clarification. Once these concerns are resolved, I'll have no reason not to endorse this article's promotion. Happy to see you bring it to FAC again after all these years. Hopefully, third time really is the charm. FrB.TG (talk) 19:16, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@FrB.TG: I have addressed the outstanding items in your initial review and have made the changes on the additional points you raised as well. I really appreciate your time in reviewing, these have been extremely helpful. Let me know if I may have missed anything. Pseud 14 (talk) 19:49, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Happy to support on prose. FrB.TG (talk) 21:25, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@FrB.TG: many thanks for your support! Pseud 14 (talk) 21:29, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Pamzeis

[edit]

Let's not screw this up

  • "became her highest-selling album to date with its lead single, "In Love With You"" — I'm having trouble understanding this. To me, it sounds like "In Love With You" is solely responsible for the album's success. Clarification would be appreciated.
I've clarified that the success of the album was generally aided by the single, as it is also mentioned in the body.
  • "including three Entertainer of the Year wins), 22" — MOS:NUM; consistency between figures vs spelled out letters
Fixed
  • "in her first singing competition on" — does any source discuss when?
Ref 13 doesn't explicitly mention the year, but it mentions how old she was (six years old), which is stated in the beginning of the paragraph that discusses how she started training going towards her first singing competition.

...I'm sorry, but I'm going have to call off this review. It's been feeling like an obligation for a while, which it should not be... I've been stressed trying to complete it... I'm really sorry... Pamzeis (talk) 13:35, 4 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Pamzeis: no worries at all, any comments are appreciated. I have addressed the above points you raised. Pseud 14 (talk) 13:56, 4 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Drive-by from CPA

[edit]

Source review – Pass

[edit]

Beginning shortly. Aza24 (talk) 01:37, 1 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

  • Version reviewed: [10] (first take)
  • [11] (second take)
Formatting
  • What's the point of "University of Michigan" in the Jeffries ref?
Thanks for catching this, I have removed the above which has been added in error.
  • All of your "cite AV media notes" refs are giving me a hidden maintenance note. Technically the "others" parameter should only be used if the author one is already used. I suspect you did this so as to not have Velasquez appear first since she did presumably not write the AV notes? I don't know if there is really a solution here, but I though I'd make you aware of this
    • This being said, are you sure there is no writer of the liner notes credited in any of these? Including them as well would be ideal, and solve the minor technical issue above
I have fixed the error. Since there is no information or mention of who wrote the liner notes, I have cited and used "corporate author" (the umbrella entity that owns the label that released the record) per the definitions in template parameters
  • Generally for refs in other language, its best to put the native title and then the English one with "trans-title". You are doing this sometimes, though not others—should consistent one way or the other
I've used |trans-title for references with native titles. However, for references with titles that are in English but the content is written in native language, I only used |language=, let me know if I've properly used it or if there's anything I missed.
  • Ricky Calderon is listed twice in ref 16 and the date is missing
Fixed
  • The Nation should be linked in ref 38, if possible
Linked
  • ref 80 (Pizarro, Shirley) seems to be the wrong author, similarly I cannot find the author for ref 79 on the page?
Corrected, should be Jojo Panaligan. for ref 79, I've removed the author, as there is none mentioned.
  • Got through about a third of the refs so far (up to ref 96). Any recommendations on what I can listen to by Velasquez when doing the rest later would be appreciated :) -- I would probably recommend the cover albums, I think you would enjoy R2K, Covers, Vol. 2 or Retro :)
@Aza24: thanks for the initial review, I have addressed the above. Do let me know if there is anything I missed or still needs attention. Thanks! Pseud 14 (talk) 03:26, 1 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 182's archive link doesn't work, but the original link does
Fixed, believe the archive link should work now
  • Ref 188's author is missing
Added
  • Looks good otherwise
Reliability
  • There is a heavy reliance on news sources, but as far as I can tell, there are no higher quality sources available with such information on the subject. The news sources in question seems to be professional and well-circulated sites.
Verifiability
  • Is it possible to include page numbers of page ranges for the linear notes refs?
Added
  • Not fully assessed yet
  • Will get to spot checks later
Spotchecks – Pass
[edit]

@FAC coordinators: Apologies for the ping. I wanted to check in on the status of the nomination after a source review and spotchecks have been completed. Thank you for your time and hope you have a great start to your week. Pseud 14 (talk) 23:05, 21 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Wehwalt

[edit]

Late to the party, I fear but not too late.

  • "she was immersed neck-deep at sea" Very dramatic but I don't find it supported by the body, "immersed her neck-deep in sea water" This presumably happened with her feet planted on terra firma. Suggest "at sea" be changed to "in the sea"
Makes sense, you're presumption is right. I made the change for both lead and body. As the ref mentions "dagat" training, a Tagalog word which translates to sea.
  • " and competed for her school at the annual Bulacan Private Schools Association competition" what sort of competition?
Clarified, singing competition
  • "Velasquez won the competition and was signed to a record deal with OctoArts International." What is meant by "record"?
Piped record deal to recording contract to provide clarity.
  • "and ended in the American Samoa.[55][56]" I might omit the "the"
Done
  • "In February 2004, Velasquez and Ogie Alcasid performed a one-night show, The Songbird & The Songwriter, at the Araneta Coliseum" Aren't most shows one night, even those on tours?
You're right, reworded.
  • "In November, she staged a three-day concert titled "Regine at the Movies" at the New Frontier Theater.[141]" A three-day concert or the same concert repeated three times?
Clarified. Three-date concert series
  • "For the show, Velasquez won the awards for Best Collaboration in a Concert and Entertainer of the Year at the 32nd Aliw Awards,[143] having won the top honor in 2007 and 2009.[144][145]" Is the top honor best entertainer or something else?
Clarified, as the latter award
  • "on the musical theater production of José Rizal's Noli Me Tángere" I might say "version" rather than "production"
Done
  • " The latter film premiered at the Manila Film Festival in July 2003.[169] In December, Velasquez next starred alongside Bong Revilla in the superhero film Captain Barbell.[170]" Do we need "film" three times in two sentences"?
I've fixed the flow to avoid repition.
That's it.--Wehwalt (talk) 17:44, 3 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Wehwalt: never too late at all and thanks for providing your review. I have addressed the above points. Let me know if I missed any or if there are things that still need attention. Thanks. Pseud 14 (talk) 18:48, 3 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Support.--Wehwalt (talk) 21:05, 3 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]
@Wehwalt: Many thanks! Pseud 14 (talk) 21:11, 3 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Quick comment by Sarasalant

[edit]

Hey, correct me if I'm wrong, but on "2017–present: R3.0, television projects and Freedom" section, isn't Velasquez's live stream concert should be written as Freedom instead of Freedom? – SARASALANT (talk|contributions) 07:50, 6 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed Pseud 14 (talk) 16:46, 6 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.